18 March 2009

a wanna-be e.t.


as you can see, my cat has made friends with the dolls. but i...am feeling overwhelmed. i came back early from my trip (at the tune of $150 cancellation fee per each of the two flights that i had bought to route me back here-- damn those airlines and their schemes!), hoping to get grounded and finish what i set out to do, but i fear my vision for this show is too ambitious. so many small things need to come together, and at each turn i just think of more-- larger-- things i want to do. my task for tonight is to stay with what's here and let what needs to fall away, fall away. for now.

i also have serious questions about my film. i think it's interesting (not 100% done yet), but picturing it in my installation, i'm wondering about overstimulating the viewer. i have 4 senses already engaged with my piece, and one might argue i have the fifth (taste) slightly triggered with the candy medicine that will be on display, so i'm worried i will overwhelm with busy-ness and visual clutter. by the way, i wish i could figure out how to upload a song clip on an entry because i am really excited about the sound element i'm bringing into the hospital. it involves a music box that i found inside one of the dolls (in her stomach when you twist her at the waist) and a vintage kids' xylophone from an antique store in pacifica.

any thoughts about keeping vs. scrapping the film most appreciated!


~

9 comments:

otto said...

hey...

in conversation with a friend today the subject came up about precisely what you are talking about...the vision and ambition to do more...and i was saying that it is very typical of one's creative vision to reveal the work that is yet to come and inspire us to jump ahead and include the future into the present...it can be tricky just to get down and to it and do what needs to be done to fulfill the vision at hand...but maintaining the parameters and allow that to happen can be just the thing that is needed...the visions of what is to come will then begin with a new wave of vigor and enthusiasm...

as far as the film is concerned...i don't know precisely what the content is or if it directly relates to your piece but you might consider showing it on a different wall...or even the ceiling...or on some up right tables with white paper on them....who knows...it does sound like the audio piece might be all you need....

good luck with it............
hope you had a good trip......
cheers.........O.

c.k. said...

hey, thanks. it's a weird feeling which feels kind of like 'settling' for showing the work in progress when there's a clear, imagined-to-be-better-executed idea of what i want it to be instead. but that's an interesting point about holding the future in the present. and it doesn't have to be disembodied future-tripping kind of chaos that keeps us ungrounded, but maybe rather just like looking at a horizon while also feeling your feet on the ground where you are.

Richard Bacon said...

Buckle your seat belts, we're all in for a bumpy ride.

For your sound element, you might think about using a different source..ie.boombox. And I wouldn't worry about the film aspect because you're engaging the audience on so many different levels. How you project it and onto what may make all the difference in the world.

Anonymous said...

Hey!
Your piece in the show was captivating.. so much to look at, so much to touch... It is very apparent that you put a lot of work into the piece. The nurse notes were fun to read, a little sad too, but really pulled the whole piece together for me. Also, the sort of rubberized nurse outfit hanging on the wall was really cool and the perfect color.
I hope in the end that you were satisfied with how the piece came out. I understand the feeling of having so many ideas and ambitions that it feels like compromising when you don't get it all in, but I think you should be proud of this piece.
Have you decided whether you are going to take more classes at JFKU?
Good luck and I hope to see you around!
Jennifer

otto said...

hey...
i just wanted to chime in here real quick and say that i totally agree with jennifer...you r piece was fanastic...you really went all out and the special added touches like the medicine cabinet and the dolls on the floor really gave it a lot of depth...it is certainly crying out for some performance element, at least from my perspective-rock that nurses uniform!...

but congrats again on job well done!

c.k. said...

guys, *thank you*. i have been feeling strangely crappy since saturday night and it's good to hear this. i think i'll post a blog entry about it since i've been meaning to.

about jfk classes, thinking about next quarter though not sure since i have trips scheduled for NY...haven't gotten used to this quarter system! if not, then in the future...

re. performance, i agree and have many ideas. i also liked it sitting alone without people because then people have their private experience with it. i didn't see it but i'm told some kids tried to play with the dolls and take them out of the traps, which i think is so sweet.

also, i never thought the two worlds could/should meld but i've been picturing that it could be a compelling visual to see rubber-clad nurses wrapping bandages live. also maybe even helping kids wrap bandages on dolls if they bring them. i think as long as there is full skin coverage and nothing risque about their clothes (other than the material itself), that it isn't scandalous...but then again i don't want to be accused of abusing children!

c.k. said...

p.s. jennifer i have a really sweet photo of you in profile reading the notes, let me know if it's cool w/ you and i'll post it.

Robbyn McGill said...

hmmm...rich with possible ways to connect here. first of all, i am a little bummed to learned you had to change a flight for this class, because i think part of our work as artists is learning to "feed the beast" and, at the same time "balance a somewhat sane life"...and tho it usually happens over a period of time, part of your post-happening let down probably is in direct connection with how much you put into the show/work/course vs. how much you got back...its like a co-dependent relationship...and if we give too much of ourselves with an undefined expectation of somethign "back" inevitably, we are bummed by the lack of reciprocity (tho i do think your classmates here have been good about feeding back and you got what you needed to some extent, later- but an immediate audience might never give you this-unless you get into performance??? or set up interactions.) we can talk about this more carrie, offline again. i know we spoke in my office, but this is rich for exploring,and helps me too. one last note- on the pop-psych side...who did you "imagine" would see the work, and what did you "imagine" they would think? (remind me to tell you the story of the mentor who never showed at my show).

xo
robbyn

r

c.k. said...

wow, a mentor that never showed...i know there's a lesson in that, but still must have kinda sucked at the time!

to clarify about my trip, i changed my flight for healthy reasons, i think, and for aligning with my intentions for the show that would have been harder if i stayed...like being present with it. once i was across the country i felt so estranged from my life here, and then i came across some harsh belittling of my project too which i wanted to get away from.

however, relevant points about giving vs. receiving and that is very much a theme i think about in my life. i also want to think more about questions of audience and how i feel about connecting and not connecting with them. it's interesting how different art forms set up a different dynamic between maker and viewer, and how it feels to be on either side.